Life is a Series of Meaningful Coincidence

"Life is not a problem to be solved, but a mystery to be experienced." Joseph Campbell

I have been asked to write about synchronicity and serendipity. What are they? Is there any difference between them? I relish the opportunity to put down in words my profound appreciation for synchronicity and serendipity, as they are two of life’s gifts that fill me with deep gratitude and wonder.

Let me say up front that I have no idea whether the meaning that I find in events and people and nature is created inside my own mind, or whether I am bending my mind and heart to make life meaningful. Who can say? This distinction is not important to me and the question is distracting. It’s a little like being at the peak of a roller coaster and pausing the scene to analyze whether I am just making up the feeling of exhilaration. Just feel the moment and enjoy the feeling. What is important is that I experience meaning and miracle as much as possible.

In order for an event to qualify as synchronicity or serendipity it has to be surprising. It has to shake you out of some habitual mindset that deludes you into believing that life has predictable patterns that you can control and explain. Some situations defy easy answers. Déjà vu, uncanny premonitions, recurring dreams, ridiculously improbable meetings, outrageous “jinx” moments – these are all beautiful, if sometimes eerie, experiences.

There is no particular causal link. For example, I am eating in a restaurant on the other side of the world in a place I have never been and there is my neighbor at the next table. We didn’t plan it. There is no rhyme or reason as to why this should happen. And yet, it feels like more than coincidence. We have a conversation that the frenetic pace of home life never allowed for. We forge a new bond. A friendship is born.

As Swiss psychologist Carl Jung said, it’s "more than chance, and less than causality". It’s a meaningful coincidence, even if just because it leaves me gasping at the possibility of miracles in every day moments.

Birds and creatures so often seem to be agents of meaningful coincidences, like a white dove hovering at the baptism of Jesus. The hummingbird appears at particular moments of self reflection as if to remind you to be gentle with yourself. The crow reappears high on the pole as if to warn you to pay attention. Jung had his own meaningful encounter with a beetle. A patient was telling him about a dream that involved a golden scarab beetle, when he heard a tap at his window. Jung opened the window and in flew a scarab beetle. Its colors matched the description of her dream. The scarab beetle was rare in that part of the world. It was an unexpected visitor. He handed the beetle to the woman and said, “Here is your scarab.” By all reports, the woman had some major breakthroughs as a result of the experience. The beetle became a symbol for transformation and wholeness.

So often, moments of synchronicity and serendipity occur at times of crisis and vulnerability. When the student is ready, the teacher appears. The teacher may be a person or a beetle, a meeting or an event.

What is the difference between synchronicity and serendipity? It’s a very subtle difference, and not one that is particularly important. Serendipity is a surprising event or meeting that feels meaningful. Serendipity is running into someone and in the course of the conversation realizing that this is exact connection necessary at this point in your life. Synchronicity is two or more events that seem meaningful because they happen at the same time. Synchronicity is hearing the same phrase used several times in the same day and realizing that it’s the piece of a thought puzzle you had been looking for.

One of the most amazing moments of serendipity I have ever heard about was the story of a Jewish man from Ohio who visited the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem. The man had some unresolved tension with his deceased father. He was blaming himself for his father’s death and decided to leave a note to his father in the wall. It is commonly believed that the stones in the wall have healing power. His note said, "Dear Father, I beg you to forgive me for the pain I caused you. I loved you very much and I will never forget you. And please know that nothing that you taught me was in vain. I will not betray your family's deaths. I promise." He placed the note into a small crack in the wall and in the process dislodged another note. He couldn’t resist reading it. Incredibly, it turned out to be a note from his father. It said, “My Dear Son Joey, If you should ever happen to come to Israel and somehow miraculously find this note, this is what I want you to know: I always loved you even when you hurt me, and I will never stop loving you. You are, and always will be, my beloved son. And Joey, please know that I forgive you for everything, and only hope that you in turn will forgive a foolish old man."

The son was ready, and the teacher came in the form of the most amazing and transformative coincidence. Maybe the long and short of it all is to have an open mind and heart so that more and more situations feel meaningful and significant. Choose to live as if coincidences are God’s way of staying anonymous. Choose to believe that people and events, especially the surprising ones, are sacred experiences.

For my part, I choose to believe that my meeting with the love of my life twenty years ago was serendipity. There was no logical reason why we should meet, coming from different cities and worlds. The meeting was meaningful and created a family and a life calling. The birth of my three children, the moves from Australia to New Zealand to America, the encounter with some of the most amazing people in the world – these and more situations are encounters with a mystery that sources my life and fills me with joy.

Serendipity and synchronicity call me beyond the thoughts I’ve known to soar like a bird and shine like a golden beetle. They remind me to trust life which surely has more plans and purposes than I could ever imagine. So many moments are tapping at the window of my consciousness, asking to come in. All I need to do is open the window.

But don’t take my word for it. Look to your own experience. As Rumi said, “Don't be satisfied with stories, how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth." Find your own meaning. Realize your own miracles. The universe is waiting to greet your openness. Fill the hunger in your spirit by discovering the miracle and meaning that is lurking in every moment. This is the true joy of being alive. Celebrate the conspiracy of coincidences that are collaborating in the creation of your life’s calling.

Thoughts about Faith in a Rabbit Hole

Im very grateful to Sharon Salzberg, Joseph Campbell and Alice in Wonderland for helping to clarify some thoughts about faith. Alice taught me that asking questions that don't need answers creates a new perspective. She took Joseph Campbell's advice and jumped, only to discover that her own curiosity provided a parachute like cushion. Sharon Salzberg put flesh on an idea that makes all the sense in the world. Faith comes in several different varieties; bright faith, verified faith and abiding (or unshakeable) faith.

Bright faith beams at the possibilities of life. It is pure optimism. Many children have bright faith. It is beyond their comprehension that life will not bend to their will. We get jaded and lose it at some point. Bright faith is appropriate for children. For adults, bright faith can come close to blind faith. Mature faith is never blind. The problem with blind faith is that even though faith can move mountains, you need to see which mountain needs to be moved.

Verified faith includes a memory of past survival and achievement. It is learned wisdom. Verified faith works closely with doubt. Doubt is not the opposite of faith. They are two sides of one coin. Doubt sharpens faith, and faith affirms doubt.

The Buddha told a story that showed the movement from bright faith to verified faith. He compared faith to a blind giant who meets up with a very sharp-eyed cripple, called wisdom. The blind giant, called faith, says to the sharp-eyed cripple, "I am very strong, but I can't see; you are very weak, but you have sharp eyes. Come and ride on my shoulders. Together we will go far."

Abiding faith is unwavering in the face of change. Abiding faith doesn’t expect life to remain stagnant. It is in tune with a purpose that doesn’t depend on circumstances. It is one with the flow of life. It manifests in whatever way is effective in the changing circumstance.

Read the whole sermon, and let me know your own story of unshakeable faith.

http://www.christ-community.net/sermons/sermon01_11_09.htm

Australia The Movie

My life began in a rural Aussie town not unlike “Faraway Downs”, the mythical outpost in the movie “Australia”. My birth town was Mullewa, an Aboriginal word meaning “place of fog”. Mullewa is a dustbowl of a town, hot as hell and as dry as a dead dingo’s donger (to use a crude Aussie euphemism).When I was born in 1968, Mullewa was still swirling in a fog of racial ignorance. I was born in a two bed hospital. The other bed remained empty, while an Aboriginal baby was born in an outside shed. At least that’s how the family legend rumbles around my memory.

The Aboriginal baby was one of the famous Dingo clan. Ernie Dingo is now one of Australia’s most distinguished actors. I would have liked to see him in “Australia”. I like to think that Ernie’s success is an indication that the fog has partially lifted on Australian race relations. The recent apology to the stolen generation by the newly elected Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd, is another indication of progress and healing.

The myth around my rural birth (my family moved back to the city when I was six months old) has always fired my imagination and a sense of justice. It was my nativity story, except unlike Jesus and his family I was the privileged one. There was ample room at the inn for me. There was no hasty escape from a tyrant for me and my family. But then again, I never walked on water either. Hugh Jackman on the other hand……….

It’s the recalling, and retelling of stories that instills a sense of wonder in me. This sense of wonder makes me believe in the strength of the human spirit to overcome adversity and injustice. I imagine the same is true for the people of Darwin. Darwin was named after Charles Darwin who visited the town in 1839. If only they knew then how poignant the name would be. Talk about survival against all odds. Darwin was bombed mercilessly by the Japanese in World War 2. Darwin was then slammed senseless by Cyclone Tracy in 1974. The surviving population was evacuated both times.

Australia is a large place, and Darwin is small and remote. Its survival, let alone its rebirth after tragedy, is itself a miracle of Darwinian proportions. The pub scene in “Australia” after the Japanese attack is profoundly moving. Hugh Jackman, the benevolent “drover” goes into the “whites only” pub with his best friend, an Aborigine named Magarri. He demands that his friend be given a drink. They drink together, and amidst the rubble of a broken town, a small victory of human justice is won.

“Australia” is an important story, and it’s told well. I wish it had been called “Darwin” as this is only a snapshot of Australian life, a play within a play. In any case, I’m thrilled that the rest of the world is invited into the story of Darwin. “Australia” portrays an aspect of the complex triangular relationship between England, a maturing Australia, and the traditional Aboriginal people. Nicole Kidman plays “Lady Ashley” who arrives from England with no clue about life on the land in Darwin. Her eyes are quickly opened to the reality of a young “half-caste” boy named “Nullah”. The police are constantly trying to “steal” Nullah to place him in one of the church run institutions to “breed the black out”.

Stories such as this need to be told, even when the stories are a blurring of fact and fantasy. Half caste kids were still being stolen when I was born in 1968 and into the 1970s. Racism in Australia mirrors racism all over the world, and if awareness and horror are heightened through movies such as “Australia” then they achieve a noble purpose. Ultimately, however, it is the honoring of the human spirit that inspires transformation and justice.

“Australia” offers plenty of that. The droving scene at cliff’s edge is heart stopping. Nullah’s bravery, Dover’s humanity, and Lady Ashley’s determination, are all awesome and inspirational. The scenery is breathtaking, and the desert appears endless. The movie appears endless at times too. But the movie does end, as the desert ends. The Japanese do leave, and people do repopulate Darwin. Racism and hatred do ease, and if nothing else, stories such as this remind me that all things are in constant flux. There is a way of living that rolls with the cyclones, dwells in wonder and offers the type of imagination and determination that helps to lift the fog.

My favorite theme running through the movie is the tension for young Nullah. He is constantly called to the land, feeling the lure of his ancestors. I wonder if it would have been more powerful to keep a veil of mystery over his grandfather, King George, whether he is real, or is an aspect of Nullah’s imagined world. What is real anyway? If I have learnt anything about Aboriginal spirituality, it is the blurring of fact and fantasy, dreaming and waking, present and future.

King George is the sorcerer, the Wizard of Aus, who wants to help Nullah find himself. Maybe Nullah finds himself much like we all do; by seeing all things as mirrors, by realizing that all is part of us and we are part of all that is.

As Joseph Campbell said, "All the gods, all the heavens, all the worlds, are within us." Maybe Nullah had to go walkabout to learn this from the land. Maybe the world needs to retell stories about racism, and cyclones and injustice in order recognize the goodness, the anger and the courage that is within.

Maybe stories such as “Australia” dislodge the screen that shields the Wizard of pretence. When the screen is removed, the truth is revealed. In the words of the Wizard of Oz, “I have been making believe.” Australians, English, Aborigines, Japanese- we are all related. We are kin. We are one at heart. All the divisions, the hatred and the rivalry are just make believe.