Showing posts with label Anais Nin. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Anais Nin. Show all posts

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Wabi Sabi and the Japanese Cherry Blossom

A verse in the Jewish text the Talmud says, “Every blade of grass has its angel that bends over it and whispers, “Grow, Grow.”
What a beautiful image! Today, where I live, I’m watching brown grass squeeze out the last reminders of snow and frost as it strains to kick start its green growth. The sun is doing its utmost to break through clouds and call to the grass to “Grow! Grow! Take my rays of light and reach for the stars with me.” It’s as if the tiny beads of dew are perspiration as the grass prepares for another spring on green duty.

Nature has spectacular patterns of growth and change. Mushrooms hover over grass as if they are umbrellas to soften the fall of rain. Every blade of grass, every leaf and drop of water is part of an elaborate ecosystem. We can learn so much from nature. It’s as if nature is your angel bending and whispering to you, “Grow, Grow. Just a little bit more.” Every turning and falling leaf is calling you to fulfill your personal potential and be all that you can be. They are reminding you that growth is not always a linear process but it always involves change. Human beings grow the same way a leaf falls to the ground- back and forth, two steps forward and one step back. Be prepared to change and fall, many times and then get back up. Sometimes you grow in one area of your life and not in another. As Anais Nin said, “Growth is relative. We are mature in one realm, and childish in another.” Celebrate your own crazy, unpredictable and sometimes even erratic, growth.

As well as being angelic and nurturing, nature is also wild and destructive. We have seen many examples of this in recent weeks. Nature’s wild outbursts call for a different human response, more active and decisive, but growth nonetheless. In this case its often courage and resilience that are added to beauty’s inspiration. Among the devastating stories of death and destruction on Japan’s north coast, some awesome stories emerged of survival against the odds. Many people, the elderly and babies included, rose from the ashes days after the earthquake and tsunami hit Japan. Against all odds rescuers gave hope back to families like a spring miracle of rebirth. Life can be a wild and unpredictable ride, but there is always more to come, more to learn and more to become. Spring is a reminder that nature, like the seasons of personal circumstance, cycles from death to life.

Imagine the joy of holding your four month old baby three days after being separated by a massive tidal wave, followed by even larger waves of grief. It is a reminder, like every spring is a reminder, to take nothing for granted and to stay open. Life is a precious gift. Give thanks for every moment of living and loving. Make the most of every opportunity for giving and growing.

We tend to want everything NOW, but it may not be time and you may not be ready. There is a time for patience and there is a time to dig in the rubble and get active. Learn from the people of Japan. What a wonderful example of grace under fire. I bow to the people of Japan and hope that if I am ever struck by tragedy I can respond with just as much character. For a culture that values nature, beauty and order so deeply, we can only imagine the heartache of living in the midst of so much chaos. But you don’t see stories about Japanese people looting or disrupting food lines, and you DO see images of people still bowing to each other and helping wherever possible.

Every year at this time Japanese people celebrate the blooming of the cherry blossom tree which bears no fruit and flowers for just a few days. Even so, it represents something incredibly powerful. The cherry blossom is a reminder of new beginnings and the briefness of life. Seeing the seed of change in a cherry blossom, or the cries of hope under the rubble is the essence of wabi sabi, recognizing order beneath the surface level chaos, perfection beneath the appearance of imperfection. It’s this perspective that enables people to maintain dignity and optimism when all seems to be lost. There is a saying, “The cherry blossom among flowers, the warrior among men.”

Wabi sabi is an inner strength and perspective that can see a cherry blossom nestled in a pile of debris or hear the cries of a baby from the middle of rubble and know that life is beautiful. Where does this hope come from? It comes from stillness that collapsed houses and disheveled gardens can’t disturb. I can appreciate beauty, but don’t attach even to the beauty because that too will change. From stillness and simplicity, your positive thoughts and acts of kindness create beautiful symmetry in an imperfect world. This story illustrates the power of Wabi sabi-

Sen no Rikyu desired to learn The Way of Tea and so visited the Tea Master, Takeno Joo. As a simple test of whether to accept Rikyu or not Joo ordered him to tend the garden. Rikyu raked the garden until the ground was in perfect order. When he had finished he surveyed his work. He then shook a cherry tree, causing a few flowers and leaves to fall randomly on the ground. At that moment Takeno Joo knew Sen no Rikyu would be one the greatest example of wabi-sabi way of life.

Cherry blossoms scattered on a perfectly raked garden are just as disarming as blossoms in rubble. They both shake you out of preconceived expectations and lead to an act of surrender. You can’t control nature, you can’t control growth, you can’t control the timing of events. But you can control your responses to life. The cherry blossom takes most of a year to prepare for its spring splash of color. Growth is like that. It arrives like a stray cherry blossom or a wild wave. You can’t always trace its path and the source of growth may be as random as stray seeds or buried dreams. In any case you often become aware of growth only after being reunited with hope. Nature reminds you to watch and be mindful. Your thoughts are powerful, and wherever you place your attention there you shall dwell.

Begin with awareness of change and possibility. Scatter a little positive thought and kind action on your awareness. You are a beautiful flower opening yourself to life, as if to say, “I’m here and I’m growing and I’m ready to bloom.”

My friend Richard Powell, author of “Wabi Sabi Simple”, has a profound understanding of wabi sabi. He summarizes the essence of wabi sabi as “nothing lasts, nothing ends, and nothing is perfect.”

May you remember that without darkness nothing comes to birth, as without light nothing flowers.
May nature teach you patience as snow covered grass.
May the earth teach you courage as the tree which stands tall and strong.
May survivors inspire optimism as the seed which rises in the spring.

Please note- this was cross blogged from Soulseeds which is my main blog.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The Benefits of Risk Taking

Last night I watched a mostly unknown Ukrainian tennis player beat the number four player in the world. I’m glad I’m writing his name because I certainly can’t pronounce Alexandr Dolgopolov. This guy was awesome and so fun to watch. It was extreme tennis, full of improvised shots and nonchalant flair. He played like he had nothing to lose. So he was free to give it his all. It made me think about taking risks. I want to live my life like Alexandr Dolgopolov plays tennis, and take more risks.

Are you a risk taker? Consider these questions-

Do you look for 100% certainty before making decisions?
Do you talk to strangers?
Do you challenge people in authority?
Would you take out a loan for a vacation?
Would you apply for a job you feel under qualified for?
Do you share private thoughts and feelings with new acquaintances?
Would you go sky diving?
Are you willing to be a minority of one on matters of personal opinion?

If you answered “no” to all, you are a safety first kind of person. The world needs people like you. You offer much needed skepticism and caution on issues of change and risk. As long as you feel fully satisfied in your caution, then have at it. Or else maybe you answered “yes” to some. Maybe you are cautious in some areas of life and not others. Maybe you would quit a well paying job to follow your passion, but not jump out of plane in a million years. Or maybe you would climb the steepest ice covered peak but never challenge your boss under any circumstances.

Do your own risk assessment and trust your instincts. Think about taking some risks in new parts of your life to remind yourself to step beyond your comfort zone. As a parent, I want to empower my kids to get to know their own risk boundaries and growth points. However I also want my kids to know that certain things like texting while driving are bad risks. Learning your own boundaries around risk taking is about living with forgiveness. We too often pass up risks for fear of being trapped, because we forget that life offers second chances. Risks are part of life’s inbuilt signposts. Risks either give you momentum to continue or a warning to stop. Either way, you know you’re alive. As Anais Nin said, “I postpone death by living, by suffering, by error, by risking, by giving, by losing.”

When it comes to matters of the heart, life calling or personal development, we could all do with a little nudge in the direction of taking greater risks. In order to be all that you can be, and push beyond self limiting boundaries, you will need to take some risks. These inner risks are far more heart stopping than physical risks but the payoff is enormous. I heard an interview with a group of climbers who described the relationship between climbing and risk taking. One said, "I climb so I don't feel like a robot, so I feel like I'm doing something that is motivated by the 'self.'" Another said, "There's a freshness to the climbing experience that clears away the weariness of routine and the complexity of social norms. Climbing brings you back to a primal place, where values are being created and transformed." Risk taking is part of how you discover the boundaries of where you end and others begin. When you push off from the guard rails of society’s norms, you get a clearer sense of who you are at your essence.

Without risk, you would never escape from the prison of who you think you have to be to satisfy the critics into the fullness of your true self that always was. The irony is that you need to take risks in order to move beyond the small self that keeps itself alive by believing there is too much at stake. There isn’t. There is more of substance in a tennis ball than in the small self’s delusions of permanence. It’s all changing, all the time. The greater risk is to mistake a memory or an idea for the way things really are, for then you risk missing the moment. At your essence you know what is true risk and what is ego’s games, and you know that risk is necessary because on the other side of the risk lies freedom.

As you blossom, you realize that there are very few real risks because there are no mistakes. When you are grounded in inner peace, whatever you do is appropriate and if you have to adjust your course, you do that and move on without self blame or judgment.

We live in a world that offers few certainties. The fearful have just as much risk of tragedy as the bold. Put your fears at ease. Remind them that you are whole and lovable, abundant and brilliant to begin with and this essence doesn’t need to be protected. Shine a light on your fear and it will be revealed for what it is. What fear called risk will soon be revealed as opportunity.

As Glenn Close’s character says to a group of acting students in her recent film Heights, “For Christ’s sake, take a risk sometime this weekend.” Its good advice, on stage, on a tennis court and in life. Take a risk, if for no other reason than to remind yourself that you are alive and you are open to the adventure of whatever’s unfolding. Take a risk to remind yourself that the beauty of life is that it offers no certainties. It is open and dynamic. Open your heart to love. End a relationship that has run its course. Make a decisive career move. Initiate a difficult conversation. Ask someone on a date. Book the sky diving adventure. Speak to a stranger.

Be safe by all means. But don’t forget to truly live while you are alive. To end with the words of one of my favorite American philosophers, William James, “It is only by risking that we really ever live at all.”

Soulseeds has a wonderful way to help relieve the stress of grasping that which cannot be controlled and living with freedom. Our Inner Peace E-Retreat offers daily inspiration and guidance delivered directly into your inbox.
We also have a packet of 20 Inner Peace affirmations, purchased in digital form or in printed cards.